Recently, my friend Michelle wrote an entry on Segullah entitled My Friend, The Apostate. It was fascinating and spurred a frenzy of comments discussing how people from various backgrounds deal with friends or close ones that chose to turn away from the church. My heart ached as I read and related to the exact scenario. My dear mother chose the same path about 17 years ago. While my friend wrote that she wasn't really worried about her friend because she knew everything would turn out okay in the end. When this happened with my mother, I was devastated. Just reading about someone I didn't even know caused me to fall to my knees in behalf of her and her children.
Over the course of my life I have spent many many hours in prayer and fasting, dreaming of the day when both my parents would be active in the gospel. My Dad joined the church a year after Brett and I married. My mom, who raised me in the gospel, left shortly after. I never stopped praying and hoping that she'd find her way back.
There are countless reasons people leave the church. Her reasons were unique in that she never really had the "issues" that a lot of people have who leave. She has always been a believer. Pains in her past, better left unsaid, kept her from embracing God's love. While it is true that God's love can be found in many places; not living what you know to be true can leave you feeling empty.
Over the course of my life I have spent many many hours in prayer and fasting, dreaming of the day when both my parents would be active in the gospel. My Dad joined the church a year after Brett and I married. My mom, who raised me in the gospel, left shortly after. I never stopped praying and hoping that she'd find her way back.
There are countless reasons people leave the church. Her reasons were unique in that she never really had the "issues" that a lot of people have who leave. She has always been a believer. Pains in her past, better left unsaid, kept her from embracing God's love. While it is true that God's love can be found in many places; not living what you know to be true can leave you feeling empty.
About a year and a half ago while talking to my Mom, she confessed that she was ready to come back. She said she knew it was past time but was scared to death on how exactly to go about doing it. I assured her that it was the right choice and that her family and close friends would support her. She knew that it would be difficult and painful but wanted more than anything to feel peace and whole.
Her first Sunday back not a single soul introduced themselves to her. Not a hi, how are you? Are you visiting? Nothing. She introduced herself to the bishop who came across as a matter of fact, accountant, who replied "Our clerk will be phoning you." When I heard this, my heart sank. We were so discouraged. In true Martha fashion she said, "You know what? I didn't come this far to let people get in my way from regaining full fellowship. Next Sunday, I'm going to be proactive and introduce myself to people and share why I'm here."
She did just that. Within a few weeks she was assigned visiting teachers and shortly after was given a calling as Relief Society secretary. Mom has always hated going to Relief Society, so this was a true test. Long, long story condensed. She hasn't missed a single Sunday. She has reread the Book of Mormon and has felt to "sing the song of redeeming love". She has endured countless meetings with a somewhat cold Bishop and has regained her ability to enter The House of The Lord.
Last weekend my sisters and I surprised her with a visit to Texas to accompany and celebrate her return to the fold.
I love the parable of the lost sheep found in Luke 15.
"And when he hath found it, he layeth it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he cometh home, he calleth together his friends and neighbors, saying unto them, Rejoice with me; for I have found my sheep which was lost."
The Lord has answered our prayers in behalf of our dear mother. We had a wonderful time rejoicing in this fact and savored the rich, sweet spirit found in the temple. I admire my momma and her tenacity for life. I hope she knows how proud and lucky I am to be her daughter.
Her first Sunday back not a single soul introduced themselves to her. Not a hi, how are you? Are you visiting? Nothing. She introduced herself to the bishop who came across as a matter of fact, accountant, who replied "Our clerk will be phoning you." When I heard this, my heart sank. We were so discouraged. In true Martha fashion she said, "You know what? I didn't come this far to let people get in my way from regaining full fellowship. Next Sunday, I'm going to be proactive and introduce myself to people and share why I'm here."
She did just that. Within a few weeks she was assigned visiting teachers and shortly after was given a calling as Relief Society secretary. Mom has always hated going to Relief Society, so this was a true test. Long, long story condensed. She hasn't missed a single Sunday. She has reread the Book of Mormon and has felt to "sing the song of redeeming love". She has endured countless meetings with a somewhat cold Bishop and has regained her ability to enter The House of The Lord.
Last weekend my sisters and I surprised her with a visit to Texas to accompany and celebrate her return to the fold.
I love the parable of the lost sheep found in Luke 15.
"And when he hath found it, he layeth it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he cometh home, he calleth together his friends and neighbors, saying unto them, Rejoice with me; for I have found my sheep which was lost."
The Lord has answered our prayers in behalf of our dear mother. We had a wonderful time rejoicing in this fact and savored the rich, sweet spirit found in the temple. I admire my momma and her tenacity for life. I hope she knows how proud and lucky I am to be her daughter.
Martha Zarate, my beautiful momma
Cristina, Mom and Crystal
Monica, Marisa, Mom, Crystal and me at The Houston Temple
Mom and her 5 girls celebrating at a local Mexican restaurant
The girls enjoying a stroll in downtown Houston
6 comments:
Clau, that was so beautifully written and sooo true. You took the words right from my heart. It was truly one of the most spiritual momements of my life. I'm so proud of you Mom. Like I told you on Sunday never ever forget that you are so loved and not only by your earthly family but most especially by your Heavenly one. Thank you for letting us make this journey with you. I love you momma!
Moni
For reasons that you know of, you can imagine how touching this post was for me sweet Claudia! Thanks for sharing it. And for your mom...YAY!
♥
That was so beautiful to read, Claudia. I've only met your mom once (and I think it was very brief), but I feel like I know her through you and I truly admire her for her character and strength!
I am so very happy for your mom and your beautiful family of girls. That had to be a wonderful experience.
What beautiful photos! What beautiful women! And I'm flattered that you would link to me. xoxo, m
Your beautiful story is one that I am still looking forward to realizing in my life. How happy I am for all of you. Never give up hope. This was another testimony that prayers are answered.
Love to all of you beautiful women.
Judith
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